Jack’s Buzz

My wife tivoed “So You Think You Can Dance?” This reminds me why I need two big screen, high def TVs. It also exemplifies how pitiful our culture of self-esteem has become. These peoples’ families and friends have LIED to them. I watched a half hour of pure pain last night. People completely certain they can dance but can’t.

I watch the first three weeks of “American Idol” for the same reason. My dark side gets a kick out of watching people who sing like a wounded cat argue with entertainment experts about their greatness. Delusion is alive in America. I love the cruel honesty of the judges.

Despite the norm of false encouragement from fam for REALLY bad performances, a lot of people have amazing talent and shine. It’s a wonderful gift to tell someone the truth about his or her lack of talent. Sort of a “go do something meaningful and stop the nonsense” kick in the pants. Occasionally, someone bad takes advice and improves or, better, he exchanges dreams.

I wonder why we don’t give preachers and church planters the same gift. God doesn’t give you dreams to taunt you. But if people give a guy false critiques, how will he know? We seem to have created a culture of dishonest passivity. What do you say? Let’s try to hold Christian leaders to the standard of excellence the Bible demands. I’m not just talking about excellence in speech and interpretation, but character and love. Honest love like on the dance show–try it this Sunday!

I’m in Washington D.C. on Memorial Day weekend. It’s 70 degrees and sunny–a perfect Chamber of Commerce day. This is Janet’s first visit. I’m excited to show her the National Gallery, the Mall, and all the monuments and memorials to our country’s greatness. I’m glad that I get to visit the WWII Memorial–Tom Hanks hadn’t built it the last time I was here. I hope to be able to thank a genuine WWII veteran for saving our world from evil men. I did that at the Vietnam War Memorial when I was here several years ago. I thanks a big old guy with a long gray pigtail, black leather jacket, and a million tattoos. He looked me right in the eye and cried. War memorials do that to you. We prayed together and he thanked me and hugged me until my spine cracked twice. There’s a lot of Christianity and hugging at war memorials too.

There are people in our country who are scared that our nation is leaving her Christian roots for paganism. Washington’s elite certainly do not seem to be good Christians–yes I am referring to Hillary, Obama, and McCain. Many Christians see California courts declaring the righteousness of homosexual marriage, and the bland if not militant acceptance of same by the politicians, and they get a little scared.

If you look around and wonder about things becoming too pagan, here’s a little piece from a good writer.

When grave persons express their fear that England is relapsing into Paganism, I am tempted to reply, ‘Would that she were.’ For I do not think it at all likely that we shall ever see Parliament opened by the slaughtering of a garlanded white bull in the House of Lords or Cabinet Ministers leaving sandwiches in Hyde Park as an offering for the Dryads [Druids]. If such a state of affairs came about, then the Christian apologist would have something to work on. For a Pagan, as history shows, is a man eminently convertible to Christianity. He is, essentially, the pre-Christian, or sub-Christian, religious man. The post Christian man of our own day differs from his as much as a divorcee differs from a virgin. The Christian and the Pagan have much more in common with one another than either has with the writers of the New Statesman; and those writers would of course agree with me. – C.S.Lewis, “Is Theism Important? A Reply,” Socratic Digest (1952).

We have little to fear from the Pagans. We might want to consider that Christianity has become more irrelevant to more people, and we live far deeper in a post-Christian culture than the one of which Dr. Lewis wrote 56 years ago.

I do not for one minute, however, fear that America has embraced a post-Christian secularity. I fear the God for whom we Christians act as ambassadors. I fear the One who holds all authority, and who told us to be his witnesses to all the nations (Matt. 28:18-20, Acts 1:8). I fear the One who told his disciples (us) to love one another so that “all men will know that you are my disciples” (John 13:34-35). I fear the One whose commands his disciples seem to take so lightly.

This feels like a rant coming on, but I will try to contain myself, which is like The Hulk saying he will try not to turn green. I am talking today about keeping promises–a big cause of success or failure. I will tell you about two promise keepers and two promise breakers.

Promise Keeper #1: Iron Man. Janet and I saw the film last night and we loved it. Every movie makes an implicit promise to entertain watchers. Iron Man kept its promise down to the end (they FINALLY play Ozzy’s song during the credits–link is YouTube video a lot like when I saw the band in San Antonio in 1976). The movie has a good plot, excellent effects, terrific acting. Robert Downey is the perfect anti-hero turned around. He even takes a poke at himself with a line acknowledging his need to get his life together. Jeff Bridges: perfect villain, held a glass like he did in Big Lebowski–a wink at his fans. Gwyneth Paltrow is innocent (great acting there!). Highly entertaining. Promise kept.

Promise Breaker #1: Hyatt Regency Reston, VA. Hotels promise a hospitable experience in line with the price charged. We arrived at Dulles and could not find the promised hotel shuttle, so I called. I was told that the shuttle only runs on the hour–it was 10 past. I took the $20 cab ride. The room was nice, but no in room coffee, no free wi-fi (even in the lobby it’s $10/day), and no free newspaper outside my door. Even cheapo Hampton Inn gives me those perks. When the maid forgot to leave me soap (and took the 3/4 bar I left in the shower so I had no soap in the room), that was it: promise broken.

Promise Keeper #2: Apple Computer Service Tech. Apple just started offering a $30 rebate on a software I purchased 11 days ago. The rebate was not available when I purchased, but I thought, “What the heck, let’s see if Apple can continue to over-deliver.” Five minutes later, I received a $30 credit to my Visa. Promise kept, again. (Free ad from me for Apple–buy their stuff!)

Promise Breaker #2: The Whiteboard Sessions. I do not know why, but I was expecting “8 influential leaders” to give me one big idea each on a … whiteboard. I was not expecting to be white[guy]bored.

Whiteboarding is something I do really well. I know this because my students tell me so. They tell me so because–here’s an idea gang–I ASK! At the end of class, students often pull out a camera-phone and snap a photograph of the whiteboard crammed with useful thought-pictures. I whiteboard because it helps people learn. I turned it into a verb because that’s what guys with PhDs do–we turn nouns into verbs, it’s an old trick invented in Middle Germany. But I digress.

Whiteboarding creates the thought of learning, interaction, pictures, problem-solving, and buy-in. My idea is not, apparently, mine alone. Several of my fellow attenders are bored, and wishing someone would help them solve their problems, or so they say. So far, conference has been 6 guys giving about 750 of us their favorite sermon. That’s it.

To be fair, half the crowd, which is still a lot of people, seem to be into this. Maybe they needed to hear a sermon from some “influential leaders.” The music was great; so were the graphics. For me though: promise broken.

So, what promises do I make that I fail to keep? A student takes my class, he or she expects some things. I know what they expect because I start every semester and workshop the same way, I ask. Simply stated, my students expect me to tell them the truth about the subject (church planting or church revitalization) and to do it in a way that holds their attention and causes them to learn. They expect me to know what I am talking about, and to help them succeed at their calling. They also expect me to grade them fairly (I do, but fair to them is sometimes a different letter than fair to me–grades have inflated like the price of gas the last 20 years), and I have only had one student who ended the course thinking I was unfair (he is in prison now). They give me the most valuable thing they own: their time, and they expect me to give them the most valuable thing I own: my expertise.

I keep my promises. OK, not always. I mess up, I fail, I forget, I blow it, I get selfish and just don’t do what I implied or stated I would do. When I realize it, I repent, and I try to make it right. I feel like a dog, and I hate my inefficient, insensitive, incomplete self. I fall on Christ and wonder why he uses me to do anything of significance. I wonder why I have influence, then I receive his forgiveness, and I go back to work, which carries another promise. I try again. I promise again. I deliver again. I keep my promises.

Do you keep yours?

I know why G.E. is selling off their appliance business. Their appliances break down a lot. I know this as a universal fact irrespective of any particular knowledge I may have as a G.E. appliance owner. How do I know this remarkable fact with such certainty? I know it because G.E. leaked the secret to me and millions of others driving behind one of their repair vans.

This morning at a red light, I looked through “I did not get enough coffee” fog, and noticed the van in front of me. I was on my way to jury duty…again…and in need of a laugh. There it was. A brand new, G.E. repair van with the following slogan written across the back doors in red lettering:

This truck makes frequent stops.

I followed the guy for three blocks to get a picture. I was late to jury duty, laughing all the way. I entertained half the jury pool with my photo.

Everyone–mind you we’d all been coached in ‘reasonable doubt’ thinking–everyone agreed that the most likely reason why a G.E. appliance repair truck needs to make frequent stops is to frequently repair G.E. appliances. The ones that break down…frequently. What else could it be? Do they deliver mail? No. Do their driver’s need to go potty often? Not likely. Do they ‘brake for kitties’? Doubt it.

So what was the real reason for such a terrible slogan on a repair truck? Simple, someone thought their slogan would help give G.E. customers a warm fuzzy because G.E. drivers care about kids or dogs, or don’t want me to tailgate them. Wrong! What they forgot is that the American public are not complete idiots (even though we do care more about what happens to David Archuleta than the War on Terror) did not think about what their words would really say.

When the church landscaping is brown, the sign is faded or missing letters, the paint on the building is peeling, or the parking lot stripes are long bleached by the sun, that church tells potential visitors, “We do not care!” When the sermon is plagiarized or lacks depth, the music is karaoke, or the prayers are rote, the speakers, singers, or pray-ers tell God, “I don’t care!”

Wonder what God says back? What do visitors say? The say, “Bye!” Why not take a moment and ask them? G.E. probably wishes they had. So does some poor sap who once had a job writing slogans for repair trucks and now sits at home, surfing monster.com.

I wondering how it is that Steve Jobs and his company (Apple) can continually outperform The Richest Geek in the World his company (Microsoft). The latter guy expects me to pay for his stuff while he debugs it, the former guy debugs his product then offers it for sale. At least, that has been my experience. One guy decides to build quality into the process, the other guy decides to let the quality come down the line after endless inspections. One church decides to make it make sense to be a disciple of Jesus, the other church puts up a lot of preconditions (how did THAT slip in there? More later…).

Vista (Gates’s current product) is, evidently, a disaster. It does not work as expected. What a surprise. Neither did XP, Millenium, 98, 98SE, 95, or 3.0, Word, Power Point, Excel, Outlook, etc. Vista is just what we’ve come to expect from Microsoft[sell]–a product that does not keep its promise. It does not work. Windows Mobile does not work either. My Treo used WinMobile and was so bad that I ditched it in a clothing store, walked down to the end of the mall and bought an iPhone on the spot. When I finally got money together for a new laptop–I bought a MacBook because I was so tired of my Dell-running-XP freezing.

Since the day I switched over, smartphone and laptop disappointment evaporated. I’ve had no issues for over a year on my phone or my laptop.

So why is Gates so rich that he never thinks about the price of … well, of anything? Why isn’t Jobs the guy with the fat house on the water? First, Jobs ain’t hurting. Second, Gates got there first. Everyone has been chasing Gates for a long time. He invented a new way of doing business, locked up all the business computer systems, and the rest is history.

Thing is, markets today change fast. There once was a front-running company called IBM. They were beaten badly by Microsoft twenty-five years ago. IBM beat NCR. Chevy and Ford beat Chrysler, then Toyota and Nissan beat all three American auto makers. The airlines beat the railroads. The railroads beat the steam ships beat the wagons beat the carts beat the backpacks. Now we have a bunch of MacSnobs (me) who want Apple to beat Microsoft like a rented mule. Why? BECAUSE WE WANT STUFF TO WORK.

What’s this got to do with churches? Plenty. The same thing that happened to IBM is happening to the bad attitude churches who think Christians are made to serve them instead of the other way around. The newer, cooler, mega-churches (even though they boast a contemporary, family-friendly style) are now becoming the powerful players who guilt-trip their members to come do their corporate thing. A host of newer, sleeker, more mobile churches are starting up in response to the problem that the church does not seem to make sense these days (read Barna’s Revolution or Olson’s American Church in Crisis or, better, talk to unchurched people in your town).

The new guys look like the Apples of the bunch, and they may turn out to be the apples of God’s eye. These are new churches doing a better job making disciples than their older counterparts. They’re keeping their promises better. People are switching loyalties and the older forms and buildings are going empty. No one knows how this will turn out. Some of the older players are denying that it’s happening (IBM tried that too). There is, of course, one major difference: churches all have the same boss, Jesus Christ.

It is, therefore, unwise for old-power guys (IBM/MS) to put down the new players (Apple). The market is shifting, but this market does not have the same variables as the personal computing – Internet-savvy – smartphone world. In the religious market, Christ is the one shifting things around. He holds control.

If what I think I see is actually happening, the newer churches are trying to reinvent the worship of Christ to fit a new culture. They’re taking humanity’s great need for the Gospel, to be connected with God and people, and making it work better. They’re creating a system that keeps its promise, not perfectly but better.

Apple does the same thing: they meet peoples’ need to be more productive by creating a system that works almost all the time. The same holds true for car companies. If Toyota makes a car that outperforms Ford, Toyota will sell more cars. Here’s a prediction: people like Apple will prevail eventually. If Apple (or the next company to come along) makes a better computer operating system than Microsoft (or the next company to come along), they will sell more units. If the hip, new church of Jesus Christ down the street develops a system that makes disciples better than the the old church up the street, we all know who will be full on Sunday and who will empty out.

Now, here’s a video for the MacSnobs: http://www.youtube.com/v/N-2C2gb6ws8&hl=en.
Enjoy.

My boy is a Coloradan, more specifically a Durangotan. Boone lives in Durango. They think differently up there. It’s NOT the Bible Belt.

Today, he told me about $4.25/gal gas. Yow.

He wonders if people will move from cities back to the country so they can grow their own food. Good question–grocery prices are driven by oil prices because of shipping costs.

Boone has been reading about the ancient Mayans who overbuilt and ruined their environment. They moved from a primitive urban culture back to an agrarian lifestyle–is that our future? Who knows?

People living in the South do not think about such radical ideas. I wonder why. Why do Christ’s Western US disciples ask such different environmental questions than His South-Eastern US disciples ask? Does living in a 90% unchurched culture cause them to see earthy things so differently? Probably. Does our friendly-to-church (though functionally unchurched) culture influence us away from questions concerning sustainability? Is not sustainability just another way of saying “stewardship”?

As I think about what it means to represent a God who decided to come visit us, I have to wonder what part environmental stewardship plays.

I drive an unsellable SUV. It’s safe and was cheaper to buy than the more efficient model, but is it right? I follow the God who is on mission (He came to us) and created us to be his missionaries, but I live within a Christian culture that is more concerned with meeting its needs than with rightly representing the Father who sends us out.

I think some things need to change. I think it may take some time.

As all my students, colleagues, and Facebook friends know that I am serving jury duty this month. Everywhere else I’ve lived, jury duty consists of come in, get picked or don’t, go home, get a check for $8-10 in a couple months tucked inside a thank you note.

In New Orleans, however, things are different–who knew? Here, you get vetted and either picked for the pool or cast out in the street. About the only way one is not allowed in the pool is if she or he is currently under indictment for a crime. This is so that none of our elected officials can serve on a jury.

Once one is picked for the jury pool, she or he is given a month to serve. During that month, one is asked to come in eight days and be available to serve on a jury. That’s right, 8 times in an entire month, or about 24 times more often than people who live anywhere else in the world. Here in New Orleans, we want our citizens well-informed on the intricacies of the criminal justice system.

Evidently, we’re the best a managing juries too–people come here from all over the country to observe our jury management system. I am not kidding. Once they know about juries, they very likely go get high on Bourbon Street, but they came here to learn about a noble subject.

Virtually every Xn I tell about my service expresses sympathy and a personal hope that they do not get picked. What?!? Let me get this straight, they’re saying they’d rather have the evidence judged and criminals freed or incarcerated by people who do NOT follow Jesus? (Rant!)
Today, I was picked for my second criminal jury, and for the second time I heard people who are supposed to be following Jesus say that they ought not serve on the jury because they believe in forgiveness and cannot judge anybody. Bad theology folks. TWO FOR TWO. One was a Pastor. (Rant, rant!)

I wanted to holler. Pick me! I will make my city safer. I can judge people’s behavior. I can listen to the facts of a case and base my decision on the rule of law. I can–get this part–render unto Caesar that which is Caesar’s and unto God that which is God’s. Jesus said that, talking about taxes, but yes (knot-head) it carries to jury duty. Moreover, the Bible teaches us that people who follow God develop wisdom that enables us to judge behavior, which is all a jury does. Do you not think that the Holy Spirit helps us discern truth as well?  Of course He does!
I do not know what motivated my brother and sister in Christ to make their comments. They said, “I believe in forgiveness and giving people a second chance.” Me too, friend, but we’re not talking about getting a guy to heaven. We’re talking about getting violent criminals off the streets. We’re not denying a person a chance to correct his path. We’re talking about giving his neighbors a second chance at a peaceful life.

No wonder people who do not follow Christ think we’re out of touch with reality.  We claim to have the truth, but some of us won’t lift a finger to solve the crime problem. Come on people, learn what the Bible really says, not hw Oprah interprets it. I really want to talk to those two, but I can’t. I made the jury and they did not, praise God!

Rant, rant, rant. I’m done. For today.

This came in from Clay. Today (Mother’s Day) was my first chance to watch it all the way through. It makes a lot more sense than any Mother’s Day sermon I’ve ever heard (including the ones that I attempted to preach). Spend the good 51 minutes listening, then 9 more posting a comment. We’ll be closer to the missio Dei.

YouTube – Michael Frost on Being the Missional Church

I’ve been prayed for by a lot of people. I know that my wife prays for me. My mom does too. My kids probably do, and I know the ladies in the WMU pray for me, and so do the G.A. kids learning about missionaries. Once in a while I get a really sweet card from someone whose handwriting is a little shaky either because she’s written millions of words and her hands just won’t form the letters like they used to, or because she’s only written a few words and her hands won’t form the letters like they want to.

I am sure that there are a lot of others, many of whom do not know me and never will. One of the beauties of walking with Christ is our ability to bless people we will not know this side of heaven, and to receiev a blessing from them.

Today, for instance, I prayed for an evangelist imprisoned in the Middle East–I doubt I will ever meet him. I prayed for David Walker and Jeff Harris, Pastors in San Antonio–I might meet them some day. I prayed for my kids, my wife and our parents, then my assistant Brooke and her husband Blake. I prayed for my student interns–I know them pretty well. I prayed for some of my colleagues even though I may never know them very well. Then I had to quit because I was going too long, and I had to get to (oddly enough) a prayer meeting!

I tend to pray a lot of blessings on people. “Father, bless her as You know best.” “Bless him with fulfillment of his wildest dreams.” “Bless [this or that one] 100,000 times.“  I know how to bless people. I really like to lay hands on their heads and bless them, but I confess; now that I am getting older, whenever I do that the Holy Spirit fills me so full that all the water in my body starts leaking out my eyes. It’s embarrassing.

I give blessings because of the blessings withheld from me and because of the ones I was given. Life is like that sometimes. I realize what I miss, and I do not want anyone else to miss it, so I give it to them freely. Other times, I realize what I have and I want others to have it, so I give it away freely. I try to find no reason for withholding a blessing from anyone. Except jerks. I’m pretty good a withholding blessings from jerks.

God has ordered things in a way that some of the people in our lives are supposed to give us their blessing. He wired us to need it. When you don’t get the blessing you need, it’s a hole not easily filled. But God is not one to let a hole go completely unfilled, so He gives you a ton of other people who offer their blessings to try to fill those holes. God likes to use people for filling the blessing holes.

Before I went into the ministry, my Pastor in Austin, Dr. Ralph Smith, blessed me (he prayed I would preach the Bible). The deacons at my church and my ordination committee put their hands on my head and blessed me (they prayed I’d be a soul-winner). When I was at seminary, W. A. Criswell, laid his hand on my shoulder and pronounced a blessing over me–a big one–he prayed I’d be bold, (go figure). I was on a trip once and a couple of old men in prayer group at Alamo City Baptist Church in San Antonio put their hands on my head and blessed me. They prayed I be filled with the Holy Ghost and do battle against the devil. That one still makes me stand up straight. Harold Bullock blessed me and Janet as we left Ft. Worth to plant a church in New Mexico. In Albuquerque, my brother Pastors blessed my ministry when I came to their city and blessed me again when I left. They asked God to make my voice speak His word prophetically and that my voice would get louder like the volume on a radio turned up by God’s hand. I am not kidding, and I sometimes wonder what to make of it (please keep in mind that the same Greek word for “prophesy” also means “to preach”.

The men who gave the other blessings added a basket full of meaning to my life. They fill the holes, you know? I cannot  help but be a hole filler. I like the role. Maybe you want to bless someone today?

Billy offers us a great quote on change: “Whosoever desires constant success must change his conduct with the times.” (Niccolo Machiavelli), and a follow up quote of his own: “Everything God touches changes. Why would the church be different?” Billy’s going places.

Machiavelli’s quote makes me think about how much I like change when I see a problem, and how much I hate it when things are going my way. That’s probably the same with you. I’d be easily and quite content with a rather mediocre life were God not so kind as to force me to change. As it is, my life has been very interesting.

You’re a group with an above average level of intelligence, and from what I can tell, you lead interesting lives. What say we try to out-quote Machiavelli? Here’s my shot:

Change, is what you dig for when there’s nothing left; it’s what buys you a treat when your pocket is empty.

Your turn.